Going to the Dentist: Some Ideas for Managing Fear

            Going to the dentist is one of the most important things that we can do for preventative health and maintaining wellness.  It is also one of the most feared experiences that people, especially children, can have.  Where exactly this fear originates has been debated, but a lot of it has to do with the sensory experience and fear triggered by anticipating fear or discomfort.  So, what to do about it?

Make sure you find a good dentist.

            This part can be a little bit tricky especially in areas where there is more need than available dentists!  Ask trusted family members and friends for recommendations.  While there is a lot of information that can be found online, this is something where a recommendation from a live human being who knows you can make a big difference!  Once you’ve found a good one, make sure you attend your appointments and show up for them on-time. 

Practice Practice Practice

            You may be wondering why this doesn’t say brush brush brush or floss floss floss.  While these are important parts of oral healthcare, they are things that we do on a daily basis and so we get used to how it feels to have a toothbrush in our mouth and floss run between our teeth.  The practice I’m referring to here is the practice of the things that a dentist will do that we do not do on a daily basis.  This process of practicing the things that make us feel uncomfortable to help us increase our comfort with them or at least increase our tolerance of the discomfort is also known as systematic desensitization.  Things like having bitewings put in for x-rays, swishing things around in your mouth for a specified duration of time, and having someone scrape your teeth can be helpful to spend some time on.  This includes having something in the back of the mouth touching the far-back molars.  For children who have never had these experiences, we can make them less scary by talking about them.  Start by showing how they work in your mouth.  Then have your child put the items you are using for practice in their own mouth and then have you do it.  This gradual process makes it more manageable for a child’s emotional response to manage. 

Coping Skills Work Here, Too!

            Also, practice together with your child using coping skills when they feel uncomfortable.  This can make all the difference!  It would be great if every experience we have was comfortable, but the reality is there are some things that we have to do that don’t feel comfortable.  Being able to tolerate discomfort is a hugely important skill!  Things like breathing, grounding, holding a comfort object or having something for hands to do all can make a difference! 

Advocate for Your Child

            Also, be an advocate for your child.  Help their voice to be heard.  Know that they are afraid of the x-ray machine?  Tell the dentist or hygienist you are working with BEFORE they start their work.    If you notice that your child may need a break, if it’s possible to help cue your child to use their words and their voice to speak up, this can become a very empowering experience.  If you notice your child needing a break but they are not yet comfortable speaking up for themselves, use your voice to let the hygienist, dental assistant, or dentist know that your child needs a moment with their mouth free of any dental implements.  Work together with the dental care team to help make the visit a success!

Some Final Thoughts

            Dentists are not the enemy and they do not like to cause pain!  When you do some prep work including practice and desensitization work as well as working together with your dental care team, fear of the dentist is a very manageable one!